All About Babies

From time to time, I come across an organization that does truly great things for families. The March of Dimes is one of those non-profit groups that has dedicated itself to improving the health of babies by preventing birth defects, premature birth, and infant mortality.

WalkAmerica is now March for Babies! The new name reflects what the event and the March of Dimes are all about: babies. Take off your walking shoes, put on your marching shoes and sign up. You’ll be supporting lifesaving research, services, education and advocacy that help all babies - nationwide, get a healthy start.

To do your part and volunteer to walk - or rather, MARCH, in the March for Babies 2009, click on the banner below.

Knowing when is the right time to potty train your child is a critical element of success for everyone involved in the process. It has been my experience that parents are the ones who need to determine if they can spare 100% of a fourteen day period to commit to working with their child. If you work full-time, have a broken household, are in the process of moving, or are having any major personal situation in your home that prevents you from giving your undivided attention to your toddler during his or her potty training - I’m going to tell you that you should wait. However, if your life is always turbulent, and you don’t see a change coming at any point in the future, just take the plunge and start training!

Most of us are busy, and there’s no doubt about it. You have a window of readiness in which your child is absolutely primed for this type of training - with minimal effort on your part. With each of my children, I found that golden window between the age of 18 - 24 months. At this stage, there’s usually limited attitude to deal with, and they are totally in to mimicking your every act. Use that to your advantage, make “the potty” the most fun element of your day, and you’ll soon find you have an extra fourty to eighty dollars per month back in the budget!

Find out if your child is ready to begin toilet training. To take the potty training readiness quiz, click here.

Instilling a strong love of literature in your child does not happen by itself and it does not happen overnight. There are many necessary components in obtaining this objective. It is necessary to interact with your child on a daily basis by establishing a routine that both of you will enjoy. It is crucial to have a wide variety of literature on hand that you and your child can select from. Lastly, a environment conducive to reading is essential.

If your child knows at the end of the day a bedtime story will be read, he/she will run to bed because that is time for just you and him/her. Pick out ideas and characters that your child can relate to and connect them to events in his/her own life. Build on creativity by making up your own stories to go along with a familiar book. Once your child becomes familiar with the words of a book, have him/her participate by finishing the last word of a sentence. Ask questions about information found on the pages of the book, for example, What color is the boy’s shirt or what is he sitting on and what shape is it? Always end your time together, recalling important details you had discussed from the book and of course, with a goodnight kiss.

Many parents question exactly what their children should be reading. This is a personal decision. There is no right answer. It is one you should base on your values and books that relate to your lifestyle. Variety is important to eliminate boredom and age appropriate books should certainly come into play. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a Caldecott or Newberry Award winning book but these are good places to start if you have little knowledge of children’s literature. Personally, I have found the classics and books from my childhood to be strong contenders in my child’s love of reading. Who doesn’t love The Cat in the Hat, Dr. Dolittle or The Man Who Lost his Head? Of course, broaden your view to include current well-known authors like Eric Carle, Robert Munsch, Joanna Cole and Stan and Jan Berenstain. If you need more suggestions, ask your child’s teacher or your local librarian. They will always be happy to help. In making your final decision, read the book yourself first to insure this is content you are comfortable with and you believe to be appropriate for your child’s learning level.

The place you conduct your reading activities will be special. Make sure it is a comfortable atmosphere for your child. Put pillows or beanbag chairs in a special corner of a room to indicate it is okay, if your child wants to read on his/her own. Bookcases filled with your child’s books encourage this activity. These can even be built or picked up at a thrift store. Small plastic chairs invite a child to browse his/her selection and make him feel a stronger connection to the books, as belongings of his/her own. Many book companies will send free posters, bookmarkers and activity books to accompany childrens’ books. Put these up around your child’s special room in frames or on their own. A radio or television in this room is not recommended because these forms of media can be distracting. A quiet room filled with child-sized items interwoven with a focus on books works best.

Of course, nothing can make your child read but these suggestions can certainly increase your child’s chances of becoming an avid reader. My child is living proof. Go ahead, grab a book, sit your child on your lap and begin to show him the secret world of reading. Start that story bedtime routine today, go to the library and check out several books and begin reading in a place that your child will want to be in. Remember, it is never too late or too early.

As your due date draws closer and closer, you might find yourself beginning to feel apprehensive about the idea of going through the birthing process - and rightfully so.  Especially if this is your first pregnancy, you aren’t really sure what to expect, even though you’ve taken the classes and read all the books.

I’ve personally “birthed” five children, and trust me, I have a very vivid memory of which methods of pain management were the best for me.  I’m not attempting to replace any of the research you may have already completed in your quest to make an informed decision on what is the best option for you.  My goal is simply to provide “soon-to-be” Moms with a new perspective on the matter - personal experience.

I remember when I was pregnant with my first child, and I was so nervous about what was about to happen to me, I read every book on childbirth that I could possibly find.  Absolutely NONE of them ever told me how much pain I could expect.  I needed to know!  Keep in mind, I was nineteen years old for the first half of my pregnancy, and the worst pain I had ever known was having the flu.  I had never broken a bone, never received any type of surgery, and looking back - had been a pretty lucky individual.

Anyways, the big day came for me to pack up and go to the hospital.   I was pretty determined that I would opt out of any drugs to control my pain, and that I would simply utilize my own method:  mind over matter.  That lasted until I was four and a half centimeters dilated - and then I beggged my nurse for something to stop the pain.  At that point, I was given Demerol through an IV - and I’ll be honest with you, it put me to sleep.  The interesting thing about Demerol is that it may have subdued the pain enough for me to sleep in between contractions, but I definitely still felt pain.  I labored for approximately four hours before actually giving birth - and because I was able to sleep, it helped the time go by much faster.  The last thirty minutes before my son was born, and the contractions were constant, I was awake, and in my opinion, feeling the pain intensely.

The one comment I have about Demerol is that it didn’t stop the pain.  I felt every contraction with full force, and I will never forget that pain.  It simply relaxed my entire body in between the contractions, which can be very helpful; especially when most of us are scared for the next contraction to begin.

With my second and third children, I had made up my mind that I would be giving birth - drug free.  I figured if I was going to feel pain anyways, why not just deal with it?  It made sense to me at the time.  For those of you considering going without any pain management whatsoever, I will disclose this to you:  you can do it!  I am the biggest baby on the face of the planet - and I did it.  One thing to keep in mind, be flexible in your decision.  There may be issues that require that you are given some type of drug to control your pain.  For instance, with my fourth child - I was told my entire pregnancy that my daughter was going to be a very small baby, and her head was average in size.  Mind you, I had a total of four ultrasounds during my pregnancy, so I was pretty confident that I would be having another natural childbirth.  WRONG!  As it turned out, I was given a final ultrasound the morning of my daughter’s birth, and they were able to estimate her weight at approximately 10 lbs.  With this information, I decided I would go for an eppidural, which was a relatively easy process.

To get the catheter started, I had to sit on the hospital bed, “indian-style,” and the anesthesiologist inserted the catheter.  The key to this is trying to stay relaxed.  They numb the area before they actually do the insert.  Expect this to feel like a pinch, and there will be discomfort for just a second or two.  Next, the anesthesiologist sets you up so that the pain management medication is delivered through the catheter in your back.

It is routine for the OB/GYN or Midwife to continue the eppidural until you are ready to deliver.  At this time, they cut off the medication, so that you can literally push the baby out.  Up to the time my midwife cut off the eppidural - I was amazed that I could see my contractions on the monitor going “through the roof,” but it didn’t hurt.  I was laughing and joking around with everyone in the room, practically in shock that anyone can have a baby without pain.  It was awesome!  Then they shut off the eppidural, and it was show-time.  Honestly, it hurt during those final fifteen minutes - but seriously, when you compare fifteen minutes of pain to hours and hours I had endured during natural childbirth, I felt like it was a no-brainer at that point.

Now, here’s where the line of comparison begins to blurr.  When I had delivered my two previous children naturally, within seconds of giving birth I was able to get out of bed, walk around, take a shower, go for a walk - and I felt absolutely fine!  I felt so good it was wierd that I had just been through hours of labor.  After having the eppidrual, I was confined to be for the first hour after delivering, and then when I was allowed to get up, I fell to the floor.  I did not get all of the feeling back in my legs for nearly 5 hours.  That may not bother most new moms, but for me, I felt totally helpless.

Another thing about AFTER having the eppidural was the fact I had a headache and bachache for about three months.  I don’t want to give the impression I was in horrible pain, but I was often uncomfortable.  Ibuprofin became my new best friend, because without it, I couldn’t sleep or focus.   As you research eppidurals, you’ll find out that this doesn’t necessarily happen to all eppidural recepients.  This is my experience, and had I personally known that I would have to deal with after-pain for three months after the baby - I wouldn’t have done it.

For my fifth child, I had a C-Section.  I made the decision to go this route because my husband and I decided that our family was complete, and I would have a tubal ligation to prevent future pregnancies.   Here’s something to think about - within five minutes of the commencement of the surgery I heard my baby crying, and the doctor handed him to me less than thirty seconds later!  It was amazing - no labor, no pain to speak of - and I was holding my baby.  My baby wasn’t distressed, which often occurs during vagional delivery - and he had the most beautiful shaped head I’ve ever seen.  Up to this point, having a C-Section got the thumbs up from me.

Then I went into recovery for a few hours.  Mind you, I was really medicated at this point, and I was terrified to move because I thought my stitches and staples would rip open.  I couldn’t be with my baby - because I had to recover from the surgery, and once the determined that the bleeding was controlled, and I was doing okay, I would be taken to my room where I would stay for four days.  Here’s where I started NOT liking the surgery.  I had four other kids at home, and had to stay in the hospital for four days?

The next challenge was to walk.  I mentioned before, with natural childbirth I was able to get up within minutes and resume pretty normal activities.  I remember getting up from my bed with assistance from the nurse for the first time, and I was in tears it hurt so bad.  To me, walking after a C-Section hurt just as having a baby in the first place!  The next problem was going to the bathroom.  You will never have any idea how many stomach muscles it takes to go from a standing position to sitting on a toilet, until you have surgery like this.  Trust me, there were more tears - and it took me about 90 minutes to go from the hospital bed, from a standing position to a sitting position and back up, only to return to bed and lay back down.

The one thing I can say about going through a Cesarean birth is day two of recover is probably the worst.  The high powered pain meds you were given by IV are stopped, and you are changed over to pill form.  Getting around is rough, and you will get tired very quickly.  After day two, each day you can expect to feel exponentially better.  Recovery does take time - and if you have time, I’m sure it’s not that bad.  For me, I had to get home to my other kids, and take care of everyone.  I wore myself out, when I should have taken help from friends and family.  Learn from my mistake on that - if help is available to you - take it.  Otherwise, you will over-do it, and your recovery will take more time than it should.

For more information on various types of pain management available to mothers during the birthing process, click here.

Whether you’re having your first baby, or you’re a “veteran parent” who’s adding to the family count, the process of dealing with a pregnancy and the additional pending financial stress can be somewhat overwhelming. We’ve all heard that new mom’s have access to free stuff for their newest addition - but where?

There is a company called Baby-To-Bee that is the new parents’ one-stop-shop for all things free! When you visit their website, you fill out one simple web form, and within four to six weeks, you’ll receive free things like formula, diapers, important information to help you get through the first months, and important tools/resources that no parent should go without.

While you’re completing the quick registration process on the website, be sure to check out all of the on-line parenting resources available to all registered users. You’ll find sweepstakes you can enter to win big prizes, excellent information on baby names, health concerns, breastfeeding versus bottle feeding, finding the right crib, and an entire database of answers to your most important questions. Are you a relative of the Mom or Dad to be? You can sign them up to save them time!

Best of all, parents have access to forums, blogs, and chats to connect with others that are experiencing the same exciting things that you are! You’ll have the opportunity to meet great friends, and maybe even have the chance to develop “off-line” play groups with other parents.

To learn more about Baby To Bee, click here.

You’ve just returned from the grocery store, and spent another $14.99 on pull-ups or premium diapers. Your toddler is showing signs of readiness to potty train…..so what do you do?

First of all, you need to stop, and think about whether YOU are ready to be a potty trainer. Here’s a little checklist I put together, to determine what I like to call, “parental potty training readiness.”

Are you a stay at home parent, or do you have a couple of weeks vacation to stay home and do nothing but work with your child on using the potty?
If your child is in daycare, or has an in-home provider, is that provider ready to work in unison with you, to ensure your child is offered potty times throughout the day?
Can you completely clear your schedule, stay at home, and devote yourself to the job of potty training your child?

Do you have underwear for your child - (do not use diapers or pull-ups while actually potty training, or it will take 10 times as long.)
Do you have a potty for your child?

Are you ready to set your alarm at such a time, that you will be awake approximately 10 minutes before your toddler wakes up - so you can begin his or her day on the potty? Are you mentally prepared to drop absolutely EVERYTHING over the next couple of weeks, when your child tells you - “I HAVE TO GO POTTY.”

Do you have 100% dedication to completing this task at this time - and will not give up?
Potty training is a learned behavior by toddlers and young children. Like everything else your child will ever learn, it requires practice, practice, practice - as well as patience on your part. Give you and your child a solid two week learning curve, and if you can honestly check off each item I’ve mentioned in the above checklist, then you’re ready to get your child potty trained.

Remember, a child can learn this life skill, only as well as they are taught. If you are not consistent in placing your toddler on the potty - you will have major set-backs. If you cave in when your child does not want to go on the potty - you will not be successful. You are your child’s mentor and role model. Make this experience positive, and reward them with your love and attention when they do what you have asked. Most importantly, give yourself, as the “potty trainer,” pats on the back for sticking to your commitment, and JUST DO IT!

From one potty trainer to another - YOU CAN DO THIS!

Back in the 1970’s, women were fighting to leave the home, and go back to work for an employer; sure to pay them approximately 1/3 less than they would any male, with less qualifications. Fast forward to the 2000’s, and we’re fighting to get back out of the work-force, so that we can take responsibility for the raising of our children.

My how times have changed. For those of us who don’t have the option to start a home-based business, or quit our jobs, we have the option of putting our babies in daycare, or hiring a babysitter to come into our homes. Which option makes the most sense, and why?

Daycare is an affordable option for professional families - and in most cases, for working families. In the case of the working family or single parent home, financial assistance for daycare is available, for qualifying individuals. Having worked in daycare centers, as well as running my own family daycare home for a number of years, I can tell you completely honestly, there is no way for one “provider” to show enough love, affection, and attention to the high number of children who need something at exactly the same time. Think of it as standing in line at a concert to use the bathroom. When you really have to go, and there are 50 people ahead of you, you’re basically out of luck.

Now, imagine your precious child being in a daily environment, in which there needs can’t possibly be 100% met, and you’re supposed to drop off your child everyday, go to work, and not have guilty feelings. Yeah, right! There’s a reason we have guilt, guys. Guilt is a natural feeling that you are not doing absolutely everything you can, to ensure you child receives the best available child care.

Do children go to daycare for years and survive? Sure they do. Is their potential tapped, all of their needs met, and are they loved like they deserve? Think about it. What is a viable alternative for parents who do not want to put their children through the daycare experience?

Hiring a babysitter or nanny to come to your home is one option that enables your children to remain in a controlled environment that they are comfortable in. One drawback that we have seen “splashed” all over the news, is the fact that the child care provider has the opportunity to be abusive in your absence. It’s food for thought… but with today’s technology, a nanny cam can shut your babysitter down - immediately. Let your provider know you have, and plan to use the nanny cam, in advance of him or her starting to work for your family. Any honest, hard-working, and dependable professional will not have a problem with this, whatsoever.

Conversely, anyone who is “shady” is going to tell you how you are invading their privacy, taking away their rights, etc. The way all parents should look at this is simple: Your house, your child, YOUR rights! The babysitter or nanny is paid help. Nothing more. You don’t have to be best friends with your provider… it’s strictly a business relationship.

Going through a nanny or babysitting agency is one way to provide additional security for your family. Yes, agencies may have a slightly higher cost, but you are paying for the background screening, the guarantee, and additional assurance that your child is well taken care of, while you work. Peace of mind is priceless, afterall.

So what have we concluded, in this daycare versus in-home child care discussion? The best option is keeping your child in an environment that is comfortable, where they can have their needs met, and where they are loved. You do the math!

You’ve just confirmed the news that you’re expecting your first baby. Congratulations! How do you prepare for the big day? What is a first-time mother to do, to ensure that she takes the best care of herself and her growing baby? Let’s talk about some important secrets that will optimize your pregnancy, and ensure a stress-free delivery.

Now that you have a tentative due date, it’s important that you realize a couple of things that can literally make, or break your pregnancy, as well as your delivery. First of all, pregnancy is a condition; you are not in your normal state. Therefore, you need to focus on eating right, sleeping more, and following a “physician approved” exercise program, designed for pregnant women. When the mom to be pays strict attention to these important items, she realizes that she will feel better than ever, and she will receive positive reports from her physicians and healthcare staff.

The next item to consider, is your job. If the pregnant woman has a job that requires a great deal of physical demands, it is probably time to consider a career change. One of the things many women do, is place too many demands on their body, at a time when it is critical that she take extra care of herself. During this time, many women who have the option to become “stay at home moms” choose to do so, because it coincides with the high number of appointments and time constraints that increase as your due date draws closer. At this time, and increasing number of new mothers are choosing to start a home-based business, or select a telecommute option, that works for their new family.

Due to the high cost of bringing a baby into the world, it’s important for the mother to be, to choose whether or not she will breast feed, or bottle feed. Preparation is the true hallmark of motherhood, and the more prepared the woman is for the choices she will need to make, the easier the transition. For mothers who plan to bottle feed, or wish to receive free baby stuff, there are companies you can register with, to ensure you receive your new baby items about the same time you’ll be returning from the hospital with your bundle of joy.

The key elements of success for the newly pregnant mom, revolve around eating right, getting more sleep, and having an approved fitness regimen. Pre-planning for the important choices necessary, such as breast feeding or bottle feeding, help keep stress levels low, when going through a major transition. New moms can take the time to register for freebies, discounts, and complimentary products; allowing for extra savings, when expenses are especially high.

Having a baby is the most exciting time of your life, when you take care of yourself, and take time to plan for your future.